ALL ABOARD!

There's a new tourist attraction on Mallorca – and we seem to be it. Of course, I don't mean us as individuals, but the rural valley in which we live. It all began in the spring, with the occasional appearance of a tourist-packed orange minibus, being driven slowly down the lane that abuts one of the borders of our land. There's a point on this lane where these minibuses slow down to drink in the views over our property and down in the distance to Llorenzo's farm on the valley floor.

Over the summer, the frequency of the minibus appearances increased – to the extent that they became daily and, on some days, there were two of them travelling in convoy. Even this week, with autumn rains lashing down, at least one bus has come by each day. We could set our watches by their arrival; we've usually been sitting outside having a coffee break at the time. It's been a bit like being in a goldfish bowl ("Ooh, look, people!"), but we've usually given a cheery wave in their direction. Such precise time-keeping surely means these excursions are for German visitors.

But what exactly do they come to see? I'm curious to know how much tourists have to pay for these trips and how they're pitched to them: "Having trouble sleeping? Come and count sheep!"; "A trip into the valley that time forgot"; "A magical mystery tour" or "Discover The Real Mallorca". Surely it's not the latter, as rural tourism's hardly something new . . .

This is a lovely picturesque valley, but I just hope these folks feel they're getting value for their holiday euros. Does the experience of journeying through our narrow country lanes, noses pressed eagerly against the minibus windows, as they pass tumbledown stone walls, fields full of asphodels and hobbled sheep, and the occasional finca, meet their expectations of the trip? There isn't even a traditional local restaurant serving frit mallorquí or a cup of coffee . . .

Perhaps next year we should erect one of those mirador signs for keen photographers, and set up a roadside stall selling drinks and snacks? Could be a nice little earner – but not half as lucrative as selling minibus excursions.

Jan Edwards ©2008